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magidThis is the most difficult day on the Jewish calendar for me.
Some of it is timing: it's the only full-day fast in the summer (~25 hours without food or water); the other one, Yom Kippur, is two months later, in the fall, and the times have changed enough so that the evening/night part is noticeably larger, which is much easier for me: I'm more hungry during the day, even when my dinner is on the early side. The afternoon today just goes on and on.
Some of it is about mood: this is a day of mourning, for the first and second Temples, for a variety of other awful things that have happened like pogroms and the expulsion from Spain. It's a static day emotionally, though a few of the restrictions ease after midday (sitting on regular chairs, washing more of the hands, things like that). Yom Kippur is all about change and transformation, doing the work of self-evaluation and asking others for forgiveness, then hopefully becoming a slightly better version of self.
Some of it is the difference in holiday status: work is permitted. Yom Kippur is like Shabbat and holidays, with many activities restricted. Also, it comes with pretty much a whole day of activity proscribed (prayers are most of the day, with an hour or two break in the afternoon).
____
This afternoon I tried to nap. It didn't work as I'd hoped: I kept on having dreams that I was eating, then realizing it was a fast day, and spitting out the food. The interesting part was how vivid the mouth-feel was in these dreams, with texture and some hint of taste, too; not something I've run into before. (Though I didn't do a great job of eating substantial food yesterday, or possibly enough food at all, which may have played into this.)
____
There was an email sent out by $JewishGroup including the times of the fast, starting at 8 p.m., and ending " at 8:47 p.m. on Tuesday, or 8:38 p.m. for those who have trouble fasting." Because those extra nine minutes are going to make so much difference for someone who has trouble fasting /snark. (Interestingly, a chassidic online site said that the end time in my municiipality was at 8:31 p.m., so there are definitely multiple opinions....)
Some of it is timing: it's the only full-day fast in the summer (~25 hours without food or water); the other one, Yom Kippur, is two months later, in the fall, and the times have changed enough so that the evening/night part is noticeably larger, which is much easier for me: I'm more hungry during the day, even when my dinner is on the early side. The afternoon today just goes on and on.
Some of it is about mood: this is a day of mourning, for the first and second Temples, for a variety of other awful things that have happened like pogroms and the expulsion from Spain. It's a static day emotionally, though a few of the restrictions ease after midday (sitting on regular chairs, washing more of the hands, things like that). Yom Kippur is all about change and transformation, doing the work of self-evaluation and asking others for forgiveness, then hopefully becoming a slightly better version of self.
Some of it is the difference in holiday status: work is permitted. Yom Kippur is like Shabbat and holidays, with many activities restricted. Also, it comes with pretty much a whole day of activity proscribed (prayers are most of the day, with an hour or two break in the afternoon).
____
This afternoon I tried to nap. It didn't work as I'd hoped: I kept on having dreams that I was eating, then realizing it was a fast day, and spitting out the food. The interesting part was how vivid the mouth-feel was in these dreams, with texture and some hint of taste, too; not something I've run into before. (Though I didn't do a great job of eating substantial food yesterday, or possibly enough food at all, which may have played into this.)
____
There was an email sent out by $JewishGroup including the times of the fast, starting at 8 p.m., and ending " at 8:47 p.m. on Tuesday, or 8:38 p.m. for those who have trouble fasting." Because those extra nine minutes are going to make so much difference for someone who has trouble fasting /snark. (Interestingly, a chassidic online site said that the end time in my municiipality was at 8:31 p.m., so there are definitely multiple opinions....)