Dear sir:

[magid]

Since it is clear you do not understand, allow me to explicate the term "one-way street."

The first part, "one-way," refers to the direction of vehicular traffic, and is generally indicated by an arrow, which is the direction the front of your vehicle should point. If the arrow notation is unclear, look at the other vehicles on the street (yes, parked vehicles follow the same rule in this case), and follow their example.

The second word, "street," refers to a clear surface along which vehicular traffic travels. In many instances, a street may include space for vehicles to park on either side. This is designed not to impede the traffic in the rest of the street.

Parking your vehicle facing the wrong way in a one-way street, thereby completely blocking traffic, is uncalled for, especially when there is a parking lot next to said street. Leaving your female companion in the car to yell at those who protest this interruption in their travel is not appreciated, especially when she says that you will not listen to her so the already-inconvenienced traveler should go into the shop to complain, since you have not left the keys. I also fail to understand why, when so summoned, you should feel a need to swear aloud, for this situation was of your own making. Nor am I clear why you did not choose to use the abovementioned parking lot when you moved your vehicle so you could complete your commercial transaction. However, this last is your own business, and I will not inquire.

I hope that this explanation will help you adhere more closely to the conventions used for vehicular traffic.

Thank you,

Me

Comments

[majes.livejournal.com]

Well written. Howerr, I would argue that this situation could be more succinctly explained by way of an ice pick to the face. As they say, an ice pick to the face is worth 2322 words (in today's market).

[magid.livejournal.com]

It is true that an ice pick to the face is abundantly clear. However, there are some considerations, to wit:

1. The unfortunate lack of said implement, since it is not yet the appropriate season for this weapon. Rakes to the face do not have nearly the same impact.
   
2. The goal of minimizing additional inconvenience is not adhered to unless the keys are retrieved before said bashing, otherwise the blocking vehicle will remain an obstacle.
   
3. It remains unclear whether the correct message would be understood by the recipient, since he might infer that he should have brought his female companion into the store, or not brought her at all, or something else entirely.

That said, I would respectfully submit that an ice pick to the face has been seriously undervalued by today's market, and is worth at least 2941 words, 26.7% more than investors assume.

[jaq.livejournal.com]

That's the second post on such subject I've seen in the last two days. (I think you can't see the other one, sorry.)

[magid.livejournal.com]

Perhaps more hours of darkness are bringing out the driving stupidity in some part of the population? Because no one will notice this at night (or perhaps they are under the impression that later at night, no one else is also using the roads).

[fetteredwolf.livejournal.com]

Reminds me of the time someone was blocking the street to lean out his window and talk to someone in a car to the left (the opposite lane). Then, when he noticed we were behind him (and not honking or anything, we just pulled up behind him) he turned into the nearby driveway. We thought he was going to stay in the driveway and inched up, he decided to pull out of the driveway and turn to follow the other car. We backed up to let him through, and he yells at SO, who was driving: "I fucking hate you!"- seriously, that's what he yelled, and sounded totally demented. It was a bit frightening, but ultimately entertaining, setting a new bar for all vehicular altercations.

[magid.livejournal.com]

People get really nuts about road things. And far too many people seem to feel entitled to have everything go exactly as they'd wish all the time. It's just nuts to spew that kind of venom on someone who hadn't even indicated irritation!

[cellio]

Nicely written. But, are you assuming that someone who either can't or won't read signs can or will something with more and bigger words? :-)

[magid.livejournal.com]

It's unlikely, true. Stranger things than this have happened, however.

(Of course, given the forum, it's unlikely the letter will get to the recipient anyway.)