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a couple of times in the last few weeks i've had people add me to their friends lists, before i'd thought to add them.
i guess i'm still more caught up in the whole "who likes me" / popularity thing than i'd thought, 'cause i was pleased each time in just that sort of way.
wish i were more grown up, felt more complete in myself than i seem to be...
on the other hand, the older i get, the more i wonder if i missed some essential bit of knowlege or arcane rite or something: i don't feel like an adult yet, just a kid with an overlayering of more experiences, more thoughts. (i keep the "rhymes with orage" one-panel cartoon on my fridge, one woman saying to her friend "i keep expecting to be arrested for impersonating an adult.") and the kid has been known to come out (particularly with prolonged exposure to my parents... why can i not keep surly teenager inside?)
anyway. did the grown ups i knew when i was a kid feel the same way? just waking up to realize they had grown-up lives, but inside were still kids?
(somehow the poem "when i am an old woman i shall wear purple" seems relevant here.)
i guess i'm still more caught up in the whole "who likes me" / popularity thing than i'd thought, 'cause i was pleased each time in just that sort of way.
wish i were more grown up, felt more complete in myself than i seem to be...
on the other hand, the older i get, the more i wonder if i missed some essential bit of knowlege or arcane rite or something: i don't feel like an adult yet, just a kid with an overlayering of more experiences, more thoughts. (i keep the "rhymes with orage" one-panel cartoon on my fridge, one woman saying to her friend "i keep expecting to be arrested for impersonating an adult.") and the kid has been known to come out (particularly with prolonged exposure to my parents... why can i not keep surly teenager inside?)
anyway. did the grown ups i knew when i was a kid feel the same way? just waking up to realize they had grown-up lives, but inside were still kids?
(somehow the poem "when i am an old woman i shall wear purple" seems relevant here.)
no subject
Date: 2002-03-18 06:30 pm (UTC)Good thing too.
And for a small hint... recently, when eating with someone I call Dad, he said to me, "Your mother is a strong woman," to which I replied, "Yes, and she usually only shows it to you." His reply was a chuckle and a smile - a shy smile you may have seen on my face before, maybe recently, maybe 25 years ago.
I don't think as many people as you think are in the "grown-up" category.